Umm hello?

There are no words to explain myself. I’m not even sure if I can be explained. No one knows who I am (except if you are reading this “blog”) I have to learn to breath deeply and understand that not everything is lies. And I have to trust no matter what. Two days ago I had a fight with my boy friend. At first when we arrive to the mall everything was perfectly fine, but I had to find the way to tell him that I felt weird this days, and that I wasn’t on my period -.- Well but when we came out of the movies we had like an hour for my mom to come for me. So we started to walk all over the mall. Then suddenly a topic came out. He started to talk about how he went the day before that one to the movies with his friend and two other girl friends. And that on the movies they sat this way: Him/girl/girl/his friend And he told me that his friend started to make out with the girl beside him. I asked him that which girls were those, he said that he always meet them on the mall, always by accident. I knew they were accidents but since 2 weeks ago some friends had told me that they’ve seen him with this girl. And so, I told him. That I didn’t like him going out with those girls. He said that they were only friends. I already knew that but I didn’t want my friends telling me that he was going out with some other girl. And yeah, I got mad. He started to freak out (in a silence way). We continue walking in a non stopping way. Suddenly we got to one of the food courts on the bottom part. I asked him that what we could do next, he told me that he wanted to sit and talk. So we did. He told me that they were only friends, which I didn’t need to worry about them, that when he met them were just accidents. I knew he was worried with me being mad with him, I could tell it by his face. He seemed lost on his world of thoughts. I told him that was going to forget this, that I just needed a little while to relax, but if somebody told me that they saw him with this girl (specially one called Sandra, really don’t care about the other) my anger wouldn’t seize that easily. He saw me with those eyes that he was even more worried. We continued walking and we came to this part kind of hidden (almost not that visited) where there was an exit. I hadn’t grabbed his hand since. He grabbed my hand, I didn’t back off, but then he started walking to the exit, I hesitated and he saw it. He told me to go with him. When I hesitated I swear I felt how my face went like if he was a stranger, and his went like if I was a stranger which he was totally in love with. We went out and a chill went through my spine. He started to tell me that I was and that I would only be the only one. That he damn love me ( he didn’t say damn, but it was a way to explain it in short words). And then I told him the truth. That I hated him with other girls because I hated when it “appears” to be cheating on me, no matter what, and hated the most when they say no and I already knew the truth. Then the tears started flowing. Tons of memories with my ex came back, and how he acted as if he didn’t care when we broke up (which yeah he didn’t cared). He grabbed me close to him, of course I didn’t back off, instead I put my face on his shoulder and started to cry my guts out. When I tried to pull my head off from his shoulder I saw how my eye liner was on his shirt and how my tears where in there too. He took the tears left on my cheeks. He told me that he didn’t knew how important was jealousy for me. He already knew about what happened with my ex. Then everything went normal. Then today, I went with my BF, Sammy, Mariana, Sergio (not my ex), Norbert, Emma and Vero to watch a movie. When we bought our tickets, guess who I found. Yep, my ex. Urgh, really disgusting to see him now, though I didn’t saw him really well because Emma and Sammy went with him and took him off, (thank you guys). Though I actually wanted to say hi to him but nah, who cares? He doesn’t, neither do I so there was no problem. Then I realized that he is now a total stranger. I don’t even know who he is. Best for me .D

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